Parents need “mental support” Why did the 70-year-old man sue his son?
“I just had a heart bypass surgery. If I can still live, no matter what method I have, I will find my son Sun Yan.
Recently, Lu Daye, who was nearly seventy years old in Beijing, took his son to court. I hope that in this way, my son who has not been in the past eight years will come to see himself.
This rare case has brought the term “mental support” into the people’s field of vision.
Confucius said that the so-called “filial piety” is not only to take care of life, to satisfy parents in food and clothing, but to “give joy and color” and to respect it from the heart, otherwise it will be the same as raising cattle and raising horses.
“There are fewer and fewer people living with their parents now. When you are a thousand miles away, spiritual support is even more important.
Wang Dahua, an associate professor of psychology at Beijing Normal University, said.
Wang Dahua pointed out that according to the level of Maslow’s needs in psychology, the elderly need to get the spiritual support of their children in three aspects.
Old people need their children to give appropriate etiquette.
When problems arise, children should accept more and less preach.
Older people have less information, and it is easy to have loneliness. Children use different ways to communicate with them, such as making phone calls, texting, writing letters, and chatting on the Internet. Messages, postcards, and letters can be used to remind the elderly to revisit them.better result.
At the time of listening, children should communicate with their parents with patience and enthusiasm, so that their emotions can be vented, and their brain function can be exercised to delay aging.
Old people need to be jealous and boast like children, and children can make the elderly feel worthwhile according to the conditions.
For example, the mother’s meal is better than the food program on TV. Dad has the best way to repair furniture.
If conditions permit, children can also work with their parents to discuss or explore what they are interested in or are good at, which allows them to get double psychological satisfaction.
Editor’s comment: When you are busy, please remember to make a little time for your parents to “return to the old”, Xiaobian feels that it is suitable for the psychological and mental state of the elderly.
Old people like to be with their children. They can tell the children about things they used to be when they were young or when their children were children. Although the children may not understand it, at least the children will regard the past as a story and listen to the old people.The spirit has also been met.
In the past few years, I have been studying abroad. Every time I return home, I first went to visit my grandmother who lived with my uncle.
The elderly have cataracts. I don’t call her. She may not know that I am coming back, but every time I see me, I am very happy. I am sensible.
Then I will always talk to her for a while. The grandmother in her 90s has a super memory and is good at speaking. It is a long list of old memories, although I have heard a few things, but each timeI can ask her some different questions. In the conversation, I actually understand that the elderly need more or the family’s respect and care.
Although the Chinese believe that the elderly should “support the sky”, but every old man does not want to be treated as a “useless person”, even if it is just after the meal to help clean up the table.
Many times, maybe we let the old man put their hands on the filial piety, but the wording may be a bit wrong, such as “Let’s put it down, let me come faster.”
The elderly are very sensitive and may mistakenly believe that young people are abandoning them.
Perhaps, at this time, it is better for us to do some light work, and to give appreciation when appropriate, which is a reason to encourage children.
Filial of filial piety, don’t just care about the material support of the elderly every month and forget to give them spiritual support.
Remember to make a little bit of time for our parents.